The Year That Didn’t Go as Planned: Finding Purpose in What Didn’t Happen

Well, here we are—December! That magical time of year when we start looking back and thinking about all the goals, hopes, dreams, and wildly ambitious plans we had back in January. You know…the simple ones like “transform my entire life,” “declutter every closet,” or “become one of those people who wake up before sunrise because they just love it.”  And now, we scroll through our planners or journals and think:  Did I actually transform this year, or did I just master the art of intentional pausing?

If that sounds familiar, you are not alone. Maybe your year didn’t look the way you thought it would. Maybe transformation didn’t arrive with the excitement, breakthroughs, and a before-and-after photo moment. Maybe—like many women I’ve talked to—you spent this year in what I like to call “caterpillar mode.” Still. Quiet. Maybe even slightly confused about what exactly is happening.  And you know what? That’s not failure. That might actually be preparation.

We tend to think transformation is big, bold, and Instagrammable. But often, the most meaningful change happens quietly. It happens when you're resting, reflecting, recalibrating. When you're noticing what no longer fits or what you no longer want.

Sometimes, transformation looks like:

•  Saying no to things you used to automatically say yes to

•  Feeling a little restless, like you’re outgrowing the life you’ve been living

•  Being honest with yourself about what hasn’t been working anymore

•  Realizing you're ready for something more—even if you're not sure what it is yet

Transformation doesn’t always look like action. Sometimes, it looks like awareness. Maybe this wasn’t your Year of Doing. Maybe it was your Year of Noticing. Noticing what drains your energy. What lights you up. Maybe you didn’t climb a mountain, launch a passion project, or reinvent your whole life. But maybe this was the year you finally decided, “I want more than this.”

That decision is powerful. That decision is the beginning of designing your best life. When we’re over 50, we don’t need resolutions, we need direction. We are done making changes just because we’re “supposed to.” We are more interested in alignment than achievement. So instead of asking:  “What should I have done this year?” Try asking:  “What did this year teach me about what I want next?”  That’s the golden question.

So… what did this year teach you?  Maybe this was your year of clarity. Maybe it was your year of rest. Maybe nothing got done—but everything got clearer. And sometimes, clarity is the greatest transformation of all.

The best part?  December is not the finish line. It’s not the end. Not the deadline.December is simply the porch light—an invitation to think about where you want to go next. 

So if your transformation didn’t happen this year the way you imagined…maybe it happened in a way you needed.

And maybe—just maybe—this wasn’t the year of transformation. Maybe it was the year that prepared you for it.